This holiday-themed episode of Experience by Design focuses on conflict resolution, a timely topic given the stress and disputes that often accompany shopping and family gatherings during the season. The guest, Gary Furlong, a leading expert in industrial relations, conflict management, negotiation, and dispute resolution. He shares insights from his books "The Conflict Resolution Toolbox" and "The Sports Playbook," as well as his decades of experience working with clients from across industry and society. The discussion explores key ideas such as the importance of process over outcome, the role of justice, and why people often just want to be heard. Conflict, as Gary explains, is a natural result of competing interests—but with a problem-solving mindset and skilled mediation, we can reduce friction and foster better relationships. Think of this episode as a small step toward peace and goodwill for the holidays
Happy holidays, everyone!
I’m recording this intro a week early because I’m away right now, trying to enjoy a little downtime. Knowing we have an international audience, I hope that wherever you are, you’re finding joy in whatever you’re doing. And if you’re celebrating a holiday, may your celebrations be truly joyful.
Of course, the holidays can also bring their share of conflict—often around shopping and family gatherings. Both can feel pretty daunting. Fun fact (or maybe not so fun): there’s actually a Black Friday death and injury counter. Thankfully, this past year didn’t see much in the way of serious incidents. Still, the point remains—holiday shopping can feel like a full-contact sport, and it’s not just tough on your body, but on your mental health too.
So, what better time for an episode on conflict resolution?
This episode of Experience by Design continues our tradition of featuring Canadian guests—and introduces our first guest named Gary! The name Gary has taken a few knocks lately, so what better way to restore its honor than by bringing Garys together in the service of a good cause?
Our guest, Gary Furlong, has had a distinguished career in industrial relations and conflict resolution. He also collaborates with Josh Gordon—who was just on ExD—making this the first time we’ve had a repeat guest connection. Together, they co-authored The Sports Playbook: Building Teams that Outperform Year after Year. Gary also wrote the seminal text The Conflict Resolution Toolbox: Models and Maps for Analyzing, Diagnosing, and Resolving Conflict.
In this conversation, we explore concepts of justice, and why flexibility and consistency both matter—but in different ways. We discuss why process often matters more than outcome, and how sometimes people simply want to be heard, even if they don’t get everything they want. Gary explains that conflict is really just the manifestation of competing interests—a natural part of being human. But just because it’s inevitable doesn’t mean we can’t get better at managing it.
The key is adopting a problem-solving mindset—and that’s where a skilled mediator or conflict coach can make all the difference.
So, think of this episode of Experience by Design as our small attempt to create a little peace on Earth and goodwill toward others.
Gary Furlong at the Sports Conflict Institute: https://sportsconflict.org/team_member/gary-furlong/
Gary Furlong and Agree Inc: https://www.agreeinc.com/gary-furlong
Gary Furlong on LinkedIn: https://www.linkedin.com/in/garytfurlong